[ shiro’s flexible. flexible enough to do high kicks in full armor, as well as tuck, roll, springs that even a seasoned acrobatic would be impressed by. he’s surprisingly limber despite all his bulk, and yet, it’s right about now that shiro realizes that he doesn’t much apply it in bed. why would he? he’s the one driving the cock. it’s the other boy that he is testing with the split of his thighs and the curl of his spine. ]
If you’re good.
[ it’s an appeasing comment, one said with a lazy smile, despite him inwardly turning the comment over and over, trying to understand it himself. does keith want to test his flexibility like shiro tests flexibility? does he want to push his legs up and see if he can get his knees to his ears? they had that brief hiccup on the walk back from the carnival; it’s not all that unlikely that, initially, keith had pictured shiro as the one laid out, legs pulled back to present his hole. they sorted it out for tonight, but maybe keith will want that eventually. is shiro okay with doing that eventually?
as always, he sticks a pin in that neverending debate, knowing that going far-eyed and distracted while keith is stripping right in front of him, will do nothing good for keith’s confidence. it isn’t all that difficult for shiro to tell himself to refocus, either. the shirt is off and keith is, in a word, pretty. creamy skin, strong shoulders, tapered torso that leads to a tiny waist. he’s gorgeous. this would be a good time for shiro to join in the undressing – get it out of the way, right? – but his hands remain in his lap and his gaze stays, blinking slow in a dazed, yet wholly appreciative way as more and more parts of keith’s body are revealed.
when everything is stripped away and keith is standing in front of him bare, vulnerable, and nervous, shiro isn’t immediate in his reassurance. the silence stretches one beat, two beat longer than an answer calls for, but then lashes flutter and his blinks a few times, as though coming to. he drags his gaze up, over that cute bellybutton, between those half-dimes, and to that pair of beautiful eyes. he quirks a grin. ]
Sorry. Needed a moment. You’re kind of breathtaking.
[ he scoots forward to sit on the very edge of the bed. keith may not be hard yet, but shiro is; the way the pants pull during the scoot uncomfortable, but easily ignorable, because shiro’s busy framing keith’s hips with his hands. he leans in, bending down and kisses the junction of his right thigh. ]
Come lie on the bed for me. [ he lifts his head, looking up the length of keith’s body again to find his gaze, only to back off and look away, nodding toward the pillows at the head. ] Want you to be comfortable while I rock your world.
[ wouldn’t do either of them any good for keith to be standing there, knees buckling. ]
[ if you're good. this is the second time shiro has deflected the topic away from his own body and redirected to keith. is it meant to be teasing? relaxing? hell, is it even intentional? keith's head swims a little with uncertain possibilities as shiro eyes him up and down. it's -- fuck. anon must've done this too, but it hits differently when keith can so obviously see shiro's gaze lingering at each part of his body -- appraising? no. approving.
they lock eyes and keith's heart very stupidly skips a beat, face warming and moony. breathtaking. shiro thinks he's breathtaking. a little giddy, and plenty flustered by the sweetness of the compliment, keith laughs only to hiccup mid-sound as shiro leans in to mouth at his thigh. breath hitching, keith fidgets, fingers pushing down the base of his dick as it twitches as if to catch shiro's attention. plumping faster, ridges slowly start to take shape as his cock fills out. wanting to bask in the uncomplicated attention just a few seconds longer, keith keeps his hand partly covering the problem appendage. ]
You're breathtaking. You literally took it just now..
[ punctuating the banter with with a playful squeeze of shiro's bicep, keith releases after a beat. ]
It's nice... being able to tell you that.
[ more than nice, but keith isn't consciously downplaying. in fact, it's more that he's tongue tied and has a stomach full of butterflies. so before he jams his foot in his mouth again, keith clambers up onto the bed as instructed and positions himself on his side, face partly smooshed into the pillow as he rolls to face shiro. there, he delicately traces a line down his boyfriend's back, dragging fingertip over whole and scarred skin alike. ]
Sp you'll make me even more comfortable if you take everything off before getting in bed with me, Shiro.
[ he continues to be rather shy. it’s sweet and adorable, even given the context, but shiro would be lying if he said he wasn’t looking forward to stripping keith of that self-consciousness, to the point that keith freely holds his hands back, widens his legs and bares everything for shiro to gawk at. patience yields focus. perhaps keith was onto something by trying to drill his own mantra into his lizard brained head. for now, shiro is good in that he doesn’t try brushing keith’s hand away. he doesn’t even try to take a peek of keith’s dick. patience yields focus, he tells himself again, smiling up at keith throughout.
but then keith is on the bed and shiro gets a very generous view of keith’s voluptuous backside as he crawls and clambers across the bedding. below those asscheeks and between those thighs, there’s the bob of keith’ cock, and for the briefest of moments, shiro catches an unintentional glimpse. it’s too quick and too partially hidden for him to truly understand it, but something inside him does. all at once, there’s a slight, burgeoning apprehension in the pit of his stomach.
but then keith is rolled over and shiro’s gaze is up where it should be, once again doing the courteous boyfriend thing of not staring at the anatomy that has keith particularly nervous. he understands; afterall, this will be the first time he'll be seeing keith hard. feeling and glimpsing it through his pants isn’t quite the same, so this is a monumental moment and one that shiro is intent on respecting. ]
Oh, will I? [ his grin is good-humored and crooked, flashed over his shoulder. ] I do want you comfortable, so… okay, if that’s what you want.
[ such a big ask, heh. reluctantly separating him from the exploration of keith’s fingertip, shiro stands. he’s already got his fly open by the time he turns around to face the bed. down go the pants and boxer-briefs in one go. if he truly were a patient man, he’d indulge keith in a slower, more deliberate strip. but unfortunately, shiro’s lacking the finesse as he tears his feet free from each pant leg, socks following shortly thereafter. with that, he’s on the bed and crawling, situating himself in close. ]
I’d ask you if you like what you see, but I think it’s pretty obvious…
[ has he been good long enough? patient long enough? can he look now? he touches his hand to keith’s hip and gives an experimental nudge, finding no resistance. encouraged, he leads keith through a roll onto his back. and then he drags his gaze down; down from keith’s face, over his sternum, through the contours of his abdominals and there, to the jut of his pelvis where his cock is…
not normal. familiarly abnormal. ] Oh, fuck. [ it slips out of him on the exhale that seemingly punches out of him. he’d made the comparisons in his head, all the while assuring himself it was nothing more than his desire for keith hijacking the situation and giving too much life to his fantasies. as much as he’d wanted keith, he hadn’t wanted him like that. not actually. but… he did? he has? because there’s too many similarities in his head now: the voice, the shape of his body, the birthmark, the timing of an identical transformation. now he has a dick with multiple ridges that he is silently counting in his head. same number, similar if not the same length, thickness, color…
[ the striptease is barely a tease, but keith watches with wide, fascinated eyes. shiro's a sight to behold with his solid, defined build and when his hard cock finally comes into view, keith actually gapes. he's only ever been familiar with the straining outline of it, or when shiro had simply been naked but not aroused. imagination does a lot of work without keith's permission though, and seeing shiro bare and wanting for the first time, keith's heart does another flutter, his own cock twitching harder.
if his lizard brain weren't so fucking immensely preoccupied, perhaps keith would have had greater presence of mind to wonder about the vague familiarity -- but then again, just how much variation can there really be to big dicks anyway? but more damningly, when shiro rolls him onto his back, keith goes willingly and lets his hand fall to the side.
cock now thick and ridged, it bounces up to meet shiro's gaze. even so, keith is sincerely hopeful enough about shiro's willingness to accept him that he simply exhales and offers up a shy smile. one look at shiro's face and that smile wilts. panic overtakes keith as he hurriedly sits up and covers his crotch. ]
I- if you don't like it, you don't have to...
[ touch? put it in his mouth? interact? keith fumbles, eyes darting towards the pile of his clothes on the floor. he should've seen this coming. shiro had made his reluctance to engage with alien anatomy abundantly clear back when keith was more galra looking, but how was keith supposed to mitigate this?
well. the answers are clearer in retrospect. he could have gently guided shiro's hand down to his cock while there were still clothes in the picture and invited the guy to explore with his hand, but it's far too late for that now. mortified and kicking himself, keith lets out a heavy sigh, shoulders slumping with his disappointment. ]
[ the window of opportunity to avert disaster is rapidly closing. there are steps, however. necessary moments, that shiro has to cycle through in order to get to that ever promising faucet of acceptance. there’s, what, five, six stages to grief? well, there's a similar amount to my boyfriend is kinkier than i thought. shock and denial are in quick succession, almost in tandem with each other. he counters the denial without even trying though, those damn similarities stacking easily, to the point that they’re too strong to refute. horror comes next, with him staring wide-eyed, still, at keith’s crotch – or the vicinity of it, since the boy has once again begun shielding it with his hands.
he’s two stages behind but keith is accelerating toward his own goal of averting disaster. whereas shiro is slogging through the gridlock of his brain to come to terms with the fact that he’s sexed up his best friend long before he had any allowance to, keith’s solution is to simply leave. he hasn’t moved to do as much, but shiro knows him; before he’s even said anything, his body speaks for him. it’s in the droop of his shoulders and the way he seemingly deflates, beaten up and broken down with disappointment.
shit.
get there faster, he tells himself. stop hinging on the fact that keith is so clearly outside the realm of what is deemed normal and vanilla. so what if keith likes to hide his identity and fuck? shiro does, too. they are the same. perhaps their reasons are even similar. the problem here though, is that shiro knows his own limitations. he fucked around with anonymity, yes, but only with one person in some watered down version of a relationship. has keith frequented other locations? other partners? how into this kink is keith, really?
i should go.
there it is. shiro isn’t there yet. he still somewhere between horror and reconciliation, but he panics in the moment, immediately exclaiming: ]
No! [ before he knows it, his own hand is on keith’s shoulder, not quite pushing him down, but firm enough to prevent him from shifting anywhere. swallowing in the following beat, shiro composes himself for a less rushed: ] No, you should stay.
[ gaze on keith’s face now, shiro tries to bolster his expression into something more encouraging. ]
I’m sorry. I just wasn’t expecting… [ you to be into being fucked through a door…? he grimaces, gaze dropping for a beat, before he remembers himself to force it back to keith’s face. ] There’s nothing wrong with it. I was surprised, but I’m fine, uhm… now.
[ the grip on his shoulder and sudden exclamation make keith flinch. the alarm is short-lived, but his heart continues to beat far too fast for comfort. his gaze flicks towards shiro for one beat, then next it's back on the pile of clothes on the floor. keith doesn't make any attempt to push shiro away, but eye contact just isn't happening.
how can it?
this isn't the first time that he's shown his dick to others, but it is by far the worst reaction it's received. not even lance of all people had reacted this strongly, though perhaps in part because keith had given him advance warning. ... and quite possibly the guy wanted to fuck a mermaid so it's not like abnormal genitals were ever a serious turn off.
heat continues to burn keith's cheeks and ears, despite the reassurance. of course there's nothing wrong with his cock, it's just .... keith hangs his head. ]
Listen. If this is a dealbreaker like how women are for you, you don't have to try to like me. I know you're not ..... you know. Into aliens like that.
[ fuck fuck fuck. the word is just going to be stuck on repeat in his head. he keeps his hand on keith throughout, both to ground him to this moment in which he feels wholly unmoored and to ensure that keith doesn’t make a dive for his clothes. he doesn’t quite trust that he’s appeased keith enough to prevent him from wanting to extract himself the moment shiro lets him go. though maybe he should; maybe it’s cruel of him to corner keith into staying like this. no. cruel would be him allowing keith to leave with things so murky and misrepresented.
that begs the question though: how clear does shiro want to be in explaining what the issue is?
he swallows, thinking of what coming clean would be like. it had taken him weeks, months to fully accept that he craved those hookups with anonymous. what if keith thinks of him differently as a result? what if he becomes the one freaking out? ]
It’s not a dealbreaker.
[ biding his time, he takes the cowardly option of weaving around the actual issue, hoping that he can set things right without dragging keith into this with him. he just needs time. time to come to terms with it himself. then he’ll break it to keith… when he himself knows how to process it. so he repeats: ]
I was surprised and I didn’t handle it well. [ understatement, if keith is currently putting himself in the same category as women in terms of shiro's level of disinterest. sighing, he turns more toward keith, touching his free hand to one of keith’s forearms. ] But I still want this and I still want you… unless I’ve turned you off so badly that you don’t want me…?
[ the hand at his forearm makes keith's gaze shift away from his clothes. he doesn't feel much calmer, but he wills it with deeper, slow breaths and gives his tense shoulders a roll. the question is absurd because of course he wants shiro, but there's no denying that his cock has gone soft in the midst of this panic.
he keeps his eyes on shiro's hand for a long beat before finally looking up at his boyfriend, expression a blend of sheepish, shy and hopeful. ]
I always want you.
[ it's a complicated kind of want, and not one that keith is always sure he wants to examie. porn prison fuckery has somehow brought the two of them together, despite the breaks in space-time or by plucking them from alternate realities. whatever the case, there's a shiro back home with white hair and a missing arm who's more than millions of light-years away. even when they're together, it's like they don't know how to talk to each other anymore.
clones, death and being replaced have a way of doing that, keith supposes.
this shiro may not be his shiro - or maybe he is? either way, when keith looks at him, he feels less adrift, less alone in the world. like maybe their bond can survive the war in some way, despite the hurt and confusion rhwy're all enduring..
keith blinks, then clears his throat. thinking about all this is the last thing he ought to be doing when it only opens up chasms in his chest, huh? he looks away briefly to gather himself then offers up a shy smile as he leans in close, shifting the hand on his crotch away to instead perch on shiro's hip. ]
Guess I should have warned you. I just... don't know how to talk about it.. In a way that doesn't sound super weird and unsexy.
[ … ah, shit. it’s odd to find himself feeling guilty all of a sudden, but having keith look at him like that, all the while saying he always wants him is… humbling. devastating. he’s such a sweetheart, with the kind of steadfast affection that, sometimes, leaves shiro feeling winded. right now is one of those moments. his lungs quiver and his breath hitches, his own expression going sweet and besotted, so thoroughly seduced by something that shouldn’t read wholesome as they both sit here ass naked. but that’s what shiro is: seduced. not just in body but in heart and mind, as well. it has him bending under the weight of guilt and truth, all prior certainty that he’d carry the knowledge of anonymous’ identity to another time, perhaps even to his grave, dispersing and once again leaving him at the beginning, to wonder if he should come clean now.
keith does deserve to know, he supposes. when neither of them knew – no, he didn’t need to know. but now that shiro has stumbled into this knowledge, the imbalance is too great to ignore. it’s wrong otherwise, for shiro to proceed by pleasing this boy while keith thinks this is the very first time. if keith is going to be with him, he has to make that decision with the full picture.
… god, shiro hopes he still wants to be with him after this. just – he broke a door. and he’s pretty sure he took his virginity, only to throw a fit about it later. and he left him that one time to go give “other” him a thirty minute orgasm. oh, fuck, he also ghosted him.
his head is beginning to hurt. he’s grimacing, eyes shuttering as every moment together pieces together, overlapping the two separate lives. as disruptive as this known identity is, it also explains a lot of things. like keith walking with a slight limp after a fuck with anonymous. like keith’s voice being hoarse after anonymous mouth spent a good portion of their hook up deepthroating. like how – okay no, he’s getting sidetracked.
keith leans in and shiro instantly forces what he hopes is a convincing smile when keith offers a shy one his way. he’s not covering his crotch anymore; that’s a good sign. what isn’t is that keith has completely lost all those lovely ridges, his arousal completely drained out of him. shiro swallows back the urge to sigh miserably, the facade of that smile cracking a little more. ]
You can talk to me about anything. [ at least that’s genuine in pitch and meaning. he leans in further to peck keith’s forehead, though it’s mostly just hair he gets and then he leans back to look at him again. ] Just like I can talk to you about anything.
[ it’s difficult at times but shiro has gotten better about that. he’s talked of his time as a prisoner, his fears, his insecurities… and he supposes he’s about to talk about kinks. there’s an obvious beat of hesitation as he wrestles his cooperativeness into actually making his mouth form words. ]
In fact, I think there’s something I need to talk to you about right now.
[ the touch and kiss are both reassuring. those words, however, are not. ]
Oh.
[ the quiet syllable escapes before keith can think better of it. likewise, hhis eyes go a little wide and startled before keith is able to properly button down the trepidation. judging from shiro's tone and serious expression, whatever he has to say can't be any god, which begs the question of what exactly needs to be disclosed specifically before sex.
for better or for worse, one possible answer comes relatively quickly. if they need to talk about something serious prior to sex, then it's likely an std, right? again before keith can think better of it, his gaze shifts down to shiro's cock before blinking back up at his boyfriend's face.
what good exactly does staring at dick do when dealing with possible alien stds that may not manifest externally? flustering keith stammers: ]
[ okay. he probably could have eased into this with a more comforting flare. between keith’s dismal oh and the startled look upon his face, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that shiro’s making this exceedingly more difficult than it needs to be. remedy tactic number one: take keith’s hands in his. remedy tactic number two: smile encouragingly. ]
Yeah. Everything is fine.
[ everything is not fine. he’s freaking out. there’s a clatter in his chest and a sweatiness to his nape. he’s far too warm in the face, too, which is only aiding in that overheated, panicky feeling zipping through him. he draws a breath, trying to steady his composure. ]
It’s just… okay.
[ it’s so easy. one sentence, two sentences max and he could clear this up: i’m the anonymous penpal you used to meet up with at the house up by the pool, i’m sorry i just figured it out myself, hence the reaction to your dick, which is lovely by the way. instead, he mucks it up by trying to gently lay the groundwork of the revelation. ]
I’ve wanted you for a long time. I fought it for just as long because I’m a bit of a fool. But even then, I used to fantasize about you when I was with someone else. When we were together, I’d like to pretend that he was you. But it turns out I didn’t need to pretend.
[ he gives his hands twin squeezes, not at all comprehending that he isn’t making any sort of sense. ]
[ it's with some effort that shiro gets his demeanor to shift, though it doesn't wholly dispel the way keith has himself convinced he has to brace for some weird news. if everything's fine, then there wouldn't be a need to make a fuss about it in the first place, right?
so maybe it's not an std, but clearly it's something embarrassing if the way shiro's gone red-faced has anything to say about it. keith is out of guesses though, and soon finds himself pulled down an equally bizarre rabbit hole wherein shiro is seemingly confessing to thinking about him while banging other men -- toji and whoever else, and keith is once again unable to keep his degree of perplexion off his face. it hits in waves, really. shiro never talks about the other guys he's with, never mind the sorts of fantasies he has. keith's barely shifted through the ugly jealous possessiveness that flares to life when the last bombshell drops. ]
What?
[ blurted out and thoroughly ill-advised, keith pulls back somewhat to get a better look at shiro's face. there's enough bullshit that goes on in porn prison that the meaning doesn't even register immediately. ]
How was Toji me, exactly?
[ the question is entirely nonsensical, but keith doesn't know how else to parse this conundrum. ]
[ between the two of them, the one with the fixation on toji isn’t shiro. a one time fling, done entirely through a device, and still, half a year later, the name is brought up like shiro had a relationship with the dude. for all shiro knows, that guy finished out his sentence and went home, that’s how little he thinks of him. in fact, the only time shiro does think of him is in moments like this. least to say, he’s blindsided and thrown, expression slacking with confusion. ]
… What?
[ so a bit of echoing going on here. he doesn’t want to give into the exasperation just begging to take over and he tries, really tries not to become frustrated with having that blasted name thrown in his face, again, especially when shiro is trying to explain something of importance here. blame the fact that he’s already agitated and nervous for the way he lets go of keith’s hands, sighing at keith’s ability to not only misunderstand, but to jump to a completely unrelated topic. ]
[ confusion detonates when it's met with shiro's exasperated judgment. keith flusters all the more, scooting further back like physical distance will lend greater perspective. surprising nobody at all, it doesn't.
keith blurts, clearly chagrined and a pinch defensive. ]
How am I not supposed to get Toji from that?! You said you were fantasizing about me while you were with some other guy and that it tirmed out to be me, but we've -- you and I, we never --
[ the thought dies mid-sentence. going down the list of everyone keith has ever been intimate with, keith can safely say that he's never consciously beem with shiro in any capacity other than that deeply awkward time following his punishment with the sexbots.
putting aside that labelling that as "being together" in the first place is suspect, that can't possibly be what shiro's referencing here, right? so what does that leave? unconsciously being with shiro? there are certainly enough drugs going around prison that this could easily be facilitated with a fucked up concoction of hypnotic and anesthetic, but if shiro knew about that then this wouldn't be the time to bring that up, right?
hell. to think less than a minute ago, keith was here braced for some reveal about space stds. is this better or worse? still getting an eyeful of judgment, keith looks away -- rethinking this whole thing.
there aren't too many guys he's been with. in fact, it's down to just lance and anon. shiro is obviously not lance which leaves ... the absurd implication that anon is shiro. it's so ridiculous, in fact, that keith winds up looking at shiro again, brow wrinkled up with confusion and judgment.
this is shiro. his best friend. his best friend who can't possibly be into choking guys with his dick at the library or fucking them through holes in doors and especially isn't into sleeping with aliens. okay, admittedly keith has little to no insight into shiro's private sex life, but still. the guy that had wanted to take things slowly to make sure things felt right between them can't possibly be so impatient and horny that he'll literally bang a door off its hinges to sink a dick in an extra half inch, right?
rimming. metal arm. large cock. pale skin. strong physique. that time he thought he might've heard his name, but was way too out of it to be sure.
the counter evidence lines up shot after shot, as keith's staring takes a distinct dive south to take a hard look at shiro's cock. identifying anyone by their dick seems like some fucked up porny scooby doo bullshit, but that doesn't stop keith from squinting at the head and girth like he's doing some rudimentary volumetric analysis of how it might fit in his mouth.
he looks up again, and this time his face isn't flushed with embarrassment. rather, his voice has gotten thick with incredulity. ]
[ if shiro weren’t currently having heart palpations and stress-induced cotton-mouth, he’d find this fascinating. this being the progression of keith’s deduction skills. shiro can practically hear the wheels turning in his head. he certainly can see each shift in his thinking, with the way keith looks this way and that, an assortment of emotions playing across his features from confusion to denial to suspicion to apprehension. when that scrutiny lands on his cock, shiro fights the impulse to steal a move from keith’s playbook and cover his crotch. he squirms, once, simply because it eases his nervousness for a grand total of one tick and then resettles, letting keith gawk and critique for however long he needs to.
turns out, it isn’t much longer after that.
keith looks up, locks eyes and… – god, it was a mistake to let go of his hands, because now shiro’s are empty. meaning, he doesn’t know what to do with them as his own apprehension spikes. fiddling his thumb and fingers together in each hand, his pinches and rolls the pads together, soon shifting to hooking his thumbnails on that of his middle fingers to make this soft, repetitive clicking sounds.
this is it. this is his last opening to laugh, smile, and say something half-convincing to divert them from the truth of their history. he’s surprisingly cowardly when it comes to keith, at least in terms of maintaining the strength of their bond, so he almost takes it. he almost takes the out.
but he presses his lips together on a grimace and composes himself after a glance down at the sheets. the fiddling with his nails has stopped and once again at a loss of what to occupy his hands with, he ends up self-soothing with a palm to his nape, rubbing back and forth as he looks to keith once more. slowly, he nods. just once. and then: ]
I'm anonymous. [ a beat. ] You know, with the smileys.
[ shiro fidgets and each nervous twitch rachets up the roiling snese of unease. even more damning than that? shiro isn't immediately refuting or asking for clarification. the guy knows exactly what's on keith's mind and the reason he would know one of keith's most closely guarded secrets here can only come down to them sharing it.
confirmation of what keith suspects doesn't take much longer to manifest. the nod somehow has all the gravitas of receiving a death sentence and keith flails all the way back until his head hits the headboard. the sound of skull bumping hard against wood isn't a pleasant sound, but keith doesn't even seem to notice. ]
It was you?!
[ processing that in any meaningful way is impossible. thoughts crumble and morph like he's being spun thorugh a kaleidoscope and nothing he says follows any coherence either chronologically or by actual significance. arguably the only good to come of this is the fact that he misses the implication of shiro's emphasis on qualifying who anonymous even is ]
You snuck out of the cube to hook up with me?You're the one who was jerking off in the library?? [ his voice pitches ever higher as his incredulity grows to a fever pitch. ] You - you're the one who ghosted me? And put on a chainsmoker voice??
[ breathe, breathe, breathe. keith stares mouth agape, still clearly waiting for a punchline. ]
I thought you were gonna tell me you caught space crabs or something, Shiro.
[ shiro does his very best not to flinch. his own reaction hadn’t been much better – oh fuck had been worse – so he can’t exactly fault keith for the exclamation. the head bonk, though? his teeth are gritted and his eyebrows are knitted, his expression radiating a certain level of pain. he should probably check that, even though keith is barreling on unfazed. unfazed by smacking himself, that is. he’s spiraling out of control on the revelation and shiro tries to keep up with him, but there are so many questions, each one as damning as the last.
he means to defend himself. really, he does. but he’s being, of all things, polite. sympathetic, too. he doesn’t cut keith off, because frankly, he’s part convinced that keith will explode if he doesn’t get the words out, what with the way his voice is pitching higher than he’s ever heard it before. so he keeps to patience and self-soothes his own skyrocketing anxiety by ticking off the answers in his head.
yes, he snuck out because he was incredibly horny for keith but didn’t think he could have keith yet. yes, he jerked off in the library but only due to that damn librarian spraying him with aphro. yes, he ghosted him… to be faithful to him. yes, he used a – wait, chainsmoker voice?
it derails him for a moment and it’s why he doesn’t take the opening as keith stares agape. regret kicks in instantly. ]
Space crabs – no! [ him? infected? what kind of sex life does keith think he leads!? nevermid that, even. what kind of person does he think he is? ] I wouldn’t… – if I had something, which I don’t, I wouldn’t wait until we’re in bed naked to tell you.
[ talk about an instant mood killer – and a bit of a dick move to drop that bombshell right into his unclothed lap.
… though. is the end result much different from where they are now? hands both empty again, he gestures nonsensically with them, mostly to keep himself from reaching for keith. ]
I didn’t know you were anonymous. Not until… [ don’t look. don’t look. don’t – okay, he looked, brows raising. not that it’s, you know, it’s very unique and identifying shape right now. ]
[ listen, keith would never have argued that shiro is the kind of guy that would do that, sinply that his imagination hadn't come up with alternative explanations for what shiro's mysterious lead in to this conversation could have been. where he'd been pale moments before, embarrassment is quick to catch up and flood his face a burning scarlet.
of course he's not going to contest anything about space crabs. in fact, with the incredulity starting to drain out of his soul, keith simply follows shiro's gaze down to .... ah yes, his flaccid dick. keith groans, knees coming up in some attempt to shield that from view while he buries his face in his hands.
this whole time. this whole fuckng time, the mystery person with the incredible dick on the other side had been shiro. it doesn't matter that there's corroborating evidence to make that fact irrefutable, keith's entire being refuses to accept it. instead, little flashes of their encounters play in his mind, every wet noise he'd made, every time he lapped and sucked at that dick like it was spilling ambrosia into his mouth, the way he clung to the chair while anon fucked orgasms out of his ass and -- ]
Mmmrgh....
[ the nooise is distilled mortification. keith had never wanted shiro to see him that way. naked, shy and trying things together was never meant to ruined by the mutual knowledge of being bent over, hole presented through punched out doors. or tainted with images of slick pouring from his ass or him blabbering stupidly during an endless orgasm.
nobody was supposed to see any of these facets of things keith has only started to accept about himself. he sags low against the headboard, shoulders rounding until he's almost in the fetal position. ]
... I think I need a weblum to come swallow me whole right about now.
[ this is going well. perhaps the better option would’ve been to take this to his grave afterall. no; he backtracks over that doubt immediately. it’s better in the long run that shiro’s upfront. they’ll get through this, shiro only needs to keep to his patience and wait it out. it’s encouraging, at least, that keith has yet to show any form of disgust or anger. shock, yes. incredulity, yes. inability to process the seemingly impossible, yes. but keith’s quickly losing sight of shiro altogether to instead turn in on himself.
he’s embarrassed. it’s an obvious thought, one that doesn’t need specific recognition, but shiro finds himself pausing on it, watching, vaguely fascinated, as keith hides in his hands. he begins to sink and sink against the headboard and it’s – huh, not funny, but considering shiro was bracing for more accusations and even keith storming out of here, the relief he feels is easily mistaken as something far lighter. thankfully, it isn’t so potent that he makes the mistake of settling into his relief with a bit of laughter. his voice does, however, take on a softer tone, alit with burgeoning confidence. ]
Hey… none of that. This isn’t the end of the world.
[ the mattress dips as shiro rearranges himself on it, putting himself against the headboard. he gathers keith and manually moves him himself to get him sitting up, where shiro is quick to loop his arm around him to hug him into his side. ]
This could even be a… uh, good thing…? [ that sure is convincing, isn’t it? he puffs out a breath, still not quite laughing, and presses a kiss to keith’s head to make up for it. ] We found our way to each other and not just that, we were good together. [ remember that talk about their insane chemistry? remember how not too long ago they’d both been nervous despite all the reassurances that they’d be compatible? he smiles, forcing a little more in hopes of coaxing keith into abandoning his hiding. ] So good. Best sex I’ve ever had.
[ … okay, maybe that’s being a touch too truthful. don’t judge him for it. ]
[ with the window of opportunity for feigned nonchalance not just shut but deadbolted and vacuum sealed, keith does little more than dig his fingers tighter to his face as shiro maneuvers him up and leaning against his side. all truth be told, he was growing rather comfortable sinking down under his shame but as putting up real resistance would only make the issue seem even more of a big deal than it is, keith simply holds his breath until he's re-settled.
there's an arm around him then, followed by a kiss pressed to his head. it's ... fuck. levity ahas returned to shiro's voice and for a moment, keith is thrown. he peeks above his fingertips, what's still visible of his forehead still a fierce cherry red. ]
You think so...?
[ it's not the angle that keith had been approaching this from at all. anon had obviously accepted him -- tacitly sure, until anon disappeared because well.. shiro pulled that stunt. in retrospect, that whole incident had been... kinda ridiculous, huh? two guys scrambling to end a pseudo relationship because of each other. keith groans, butting the side of his head against shiro's chest. ]
Was it really the best?
[ all things considered, perhaps not what keith ought to be focusing on, but somehow reframing this whole thing from shiro's perspective is easier than looking at it from his own. ]
[ shiro’s the one with experience here, but although he’s had a good amount of lays, he doesn’t have a lot of names to his list of sexual partners. adam contributes the most. it’d been good at the time. fulfilling. enough. young as he’d been, sex of any quality was sufficient enough to keep a bounce in his step and a deeply sated feeling extending. now, he has further experience to measure it up against. granted, looking back on a failed engagement likely colors his opinion on the sex, but overall, it hadn’t been like that. hot and frenzied, messy and greedy, all encompassing as good sense fled and only desire remained; sex with anonymous had been a little bit of an adventure from start to finish, some of it so potent in his memory that it’d provide good fodder for a wank the following day.
heh, to think he’s gone a month without that now.
it’s no grand feat, really, because he has something else to fill the gap. he has a very cute, sometimes surprisingly shy boy, who curls up with him at night and offers him kisses when shiro is particularly sweet. it’s the polar opposite of the animalistic brutality of broken doors and roughly handled bodies, but somehow, it’s just as satisfying to keep him grounded and focused, not even a hint of regret making its way into his brain. ]
Yeah. [ he noses, briefly, at keith’s hair. ] It won’t be after tonight… or, I mean, whenever we…
[ they are very much naked in this very large bed of theirs, but even so, it suddenly feels presumptuous to assume that the evening is going to pan out the way they’d originally thought it would. truthfully? there’s disappointment to be found in the notion that they may delay another day, but overall, shiro isn’t too bothered by it. so the smile doesn’t flee and his good mood doesn’t dessert him; he clings tight to both, arm looping closer to encourage keith’s lean.
he lifts his head, only because the angle is deep enough that his neck protests. knocking it gently back to the headboard, shiro stares across the room, again stripping away layers to try for more honesty. ]
I enjoyed it. The freedom of not being seen. [ he’ll wager that much was the same for keith. so maybe he’s preaching to the choir here. nonetheless – ] I didn’t have to be me. I didn’t have to think like me, didn’t have to act like me, didn’t have to be what anyone expected me to be… I could block out everything and just… [ a breath. ] – feel good in the moment.
[ his fingers curl at keith’s hip, tracing abstract shapes into his skin. ]
… But now I wanna feel good with you. [ and considering keith’s been in his head for months now, superimposed onto someone who wasn’t supposed to be him, shiro can only assume being with the real keith is going to be so, so much better. ]
[ with the warmth of shiro's skin pressed close, the temptation to continue hiding behind his hands gradually ceases to be a real temptation at all. it only takes a few moments of listening to his boyfriend talking for keith's face to be lulled up, magnetized. it takes even less time for a smile to bloom. it starts out small and a little shy, before a kindling spark turns into a warm ember.
they've been best friends for years, and for all their similarities and shared interests... it's still kind of fascinating to think maybe they do feel similarly about sex. of course, that isn't something keith anticipated. after all, shiro's had other partners and a sex life that predated the one imposed on them by the warden.
sex isn't inherently unnatural or some grotesque scrambling of his autonomy. of course keith knows that, but in practice it's been harder to come to terms with actually being okay with wanting it for himself because experience hasn't always been equated with choice. there's a word for that -- trauma, perhaps, but a rough life has made it difficult to even unpack that for what it is. after all, he's been in more battles than he cares to count, and seen more people die than he wants to remember. this is nothing in comparison, right?
or so he thought. in the end, it's exactly as shiro said. it had been freeing to be someone other than himself while allowing anon to explore his body. it had been more enjoyable precisely because keith didn't have to think or feel anything than what he was made to feel by anon's fingers and tongue and cock.
shiro's.
keith tries out the correction, eyes still on his boyfriend's face, then has to look away when the flutter in his chest refuses to subside. he hiccups a tiny laugh, twisting enough to bump his cheek to shiro's chest. and then... what that isn't close enough? keith frees himself from shiro's arm to carefully straddle his thighs. ]
It could still be tonight. If you want. [ if you want. keith shakes his head, unsatisfied. ] Because that's what I want.
[ still smiling, keith traces a long line from collarbone down to shiro's flesh hand, taking it and intertwining their fingers. ]
Sounds stupid but... I really didn't want to want., I guess. [ he huffs, expression turning slightly self deprecating. ] Heh. You know. If you hadn't ghosted me, I was planning on saying thank you. For helping me figure things out ... and for showing me it was gonna be okay. ....Aaand then I was going to break it off with you because I realized that even though things were okay, I didn't want to be just okay. I wanted you. [ a beat. ] No, I want you. I want to kiss you. I wanna be able to say your name while we touch.
[ pause. is that too subtle? ]
I want to look at you and hold you while you fuck me.
Edited (SHHH this bothered me immensely) 2022-12-03 20:22 (UTC)
[ ah, yes. the ghosting. can’t let him forget that. the urge to laugh comes and goes, so quickly that he gets nowhere near actually laughing. he’s smiling, though. easy to, when keith’s straddling his thighs, weight comfortable and promising there in his lap. that alone is confirmation that it really can still be tonight; that’s not what has shiro feeling the bulk of his relief, though. it’s the ghosting, actually. the fact that keith is talking about it so easily now. shiro’s grateful for that because given enough time, he’d likely drag himself down with regret for ending things so cowardly. he already has felt bad about it, but that was before he knew it was keith. terrible, huh? that he feels worse for the same action when it is applied to keith, rather than a nameless individual. that says something about him, that his conscience isn’t an unbias, consistent voice. he feels more when it comes to keith, the good, the bad, the everything in between.
he can’t say he’s surprised by the revelation. he harbors favoritism for keith; he has for a long time, even when he was vehement of his denial for it.
throughout keith’s talking, shiro keeps his smile, watching patiently and fondly, as keith works through his own wants. he squeezes encouragingly at his hand, his free one rubbing at keith’s thigh. it travels up in the pause, thumb tracing along the angle of keith’s pelvic bone as his fingers curl around and his palm flattens to his hip. while you fuck me. his gaze is steady, but growing heavier, because while he doesn’t make any obvious outward reaction to it, his abdomen tightens on a flutter and a shiver runs down his spine, accumulating and spreading through his lower body to make him twitch. ]
I want that, too.
[ he breathes out the words, voice already weighty with renewed desire. leaning in, he tips the angle to press a kiss to keith’s jaw, nosing further along the hard line of it. fuck, being able to see keith’s face when they’re connected… – he wanted that before. he tried to create a poor man’s mimic of such intimacy by riding anonymous and himself of the door. it simply wasn’t enough. the eyes, the mouth, the sweaty tangles of hair – the best parts were covered up. so that’s all it takes, one little mention, and shiro is quickly losing his patience and composure. he’s thinking of keith arching off the sheets, hair haloed around him as he tries to focus his eyes. fuck. or keith riding him just like this, with his head tipped back and neck arched. shiro would have to take a fistful of his hair and yank him down, huh? he’d have to keep those eyes on him, to never waver throughout every drop down of keith’s body.
he groans, metal fingers tightening at his hip. ] Bet you’re a sight when you’re full of me. [ his body has certainly been greedy for his cock; does that insatiable desire make its way to keith’s face? does he go all dark eyed and flushed, soft, full lips finally able to to part around noises that won’t be muffled? ] Can’t believe I’ve had you all those times and I never got to see, got to hear…
[ he huffs a breath just barely resembling a laugh and then explores his galra hand up keith’s torso, sliding in to skim his fingertips along the shape of his pec and over his nipple. ]
I said your name once. [ cooed. casual. ] Do you remember? [ he pulls back to get a full look at keith, grinning. ] You felt so good around me that I lost my mind. [ a beat, fingers giving a playful pinch at his nip. ] Think you can do it again? Maybe make me yell it this time… not in that chainsmoker voice you love so much?
[ shiro leans forward and ... oh. mouth slightly open, keith never manages to get a proper word out the heat of shiro's lips is hot on his jaw, sending a cascade of tingles shooting down his spine. his head tips back of its own accord, eyes half lidded as shiro mouths at his neck and hands circle at his hips and up to his chest.
barely a minute in, and everything is different. constraints enforced by glory holes and anonymity had eliminated most avenues of foreplay. even towards the end of those hook ups, there'd still been a sheet to keep most of him covered, and touch had almost always been more more direct right from the get go. hands on his cock, fingers scissoring his rim, a tongue pushed inside his hole -- all with the assumption of enforced silence.
shiro's voice in this context is damn near intoxicating. kisses, butterfly touches and pinches. keith moans as fingers squeeze a half dime pert, cock filling out again fast with a twitch. fuck -- those stupid mandatory "good mate" classes have more or less drilled into his head what's considered an erogenous zone, but knowing the nipple is one of those things is still not wholly the same as discovering in real time that he's sensitive here too. he flushes, slowly lettin expelling a long puff of breath as he gathers his wits. ]
I remember.... [ voice breathy, keith drags his hnads up shiro's arms, feeling the strength in his boyfriend's biceps and shoulders with appreciative squeezes. he shivers, before scooting a little closer hips just shy of being flush to shiro's but close enough that the tip of his cock brushess just beneath shiro's cockhead. ] Kind of.. I wasn't really really thinking straight at all.
[ he laughs, looking sheepish for a moment. ]
Being full of you kinda has that effect.
[ of course, being in the throes of a frighteningly long orgasm hadn't exactly helped his coherence either. keith glances down at their almost touching cocks, then looks back up at shiro to steal an open mouthed kiss and pulls away with a gentle bite at his lower lip. that bit of cheek is all the warning shiro gets before keith reaches down to grab him by the balls. ]
You'd yell if I squeezed now, yeah?
[ he wouldn't, of course. a point made self evident a half beat later when he lets go in favor of indulgently tracing a thick vein up to the frenulum simply because he can.. being the one covered up has kept keith strictly on the receiving end of anon's whims, and it's exhilarating to look and see how shiro reacts to him for a change. ]
Heh. it's our first real time together and you're already turning it into a challenge. Unbelievable.
[ except it's not. it's so ridiculous shiro that even though keith is teasing, his heart is overstuffed with fondness. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
i pictured the pokestation perfectly in my brain & started laughing, i want you to know that
If you’re good.
[ it’s an appeasing comment, one said with a lazy smile, despite him inwardly turning the comment over and over, trying to understand it himself. does keith want to test his flexibility like shiro tests flexibility? does he want to push his legs up and see if he can get his knees to his ears? they had that brief hiccup on the walk back from the carnival; it’s not all that unlikely that, initially, keith had pictured shiro as the one laid out, legs pulled back to present his hole. they sorted it out for tonight, but maybe keith will want that eventually. is shiro okay with doing that eventually?
as always, he sticks a pin in that neverending debate, knowing that going far-eyed and distracted while keith is stripping right in front of him, will do nothing good for keith’s confidence. it isn’t all that difficult for shiro to tell himself to refocus, either. the shirt is off and keith is, in a word, pretty. creamy skin, strong shoulders, tapered torso that leads to a tiny waist. he’s gorgeous. this would be a good time for shiro to join in the undressing – get it out of the way, right? – but his hands remain in his lap and his gaze stays, blinking slow in a dazed, yet wholly appreciative way as more and more parts of keith’s body are revealed.
when everything is stripped away and keith is standing in front of him bare, vulnerable, and nervous, shiro isn’t immediate in his reassurance. the silence stretches one beat, two beat longer than an answer calls for, but then lashes flutter and his blinks a few times, as though coming to. he drags his gaze up, over that cute bellybutton, between those half-dimes, and to that pair of beautiful eyes. he quirks a grin. ]
Sorry. Needed a moment. You’re kind of breathtaking.
[ he scoots forward to sit on the very edge of the bed. keith may not be hard yet, but shiro is; the way the pants pull during the scoot uncomfortable, but easily ignorable, because shiro’s busy framing keith’s hips with his hands. he leans in, bending down and kisses the junction of his right thigh. ]
Come lie on the bed for me. [ he lifts his head, looking up the length of keith’s body again to find his gaze, only to back off and look away, nodding toward the pillows at the head. ] Want you to be comfortable while I rock your world.
[ wouldn’t do either of them any good for keith to be standing there, knees buckling. ]
GOOD =w=
they lock eyes and keith's heart very stupidly skips a beat, face warming and moony. breathtaking. shiro thinks he's breathtaking. a little giddy, and plenty flustered by the sweetness of the compliment, keith laughs only to hiccup mid-sound as shiro leans in to mouth at his thigh. breath hitching, keith fidgets, fingers pushing down the base of his dick as it twitches as if to catch shiro's attention. plumping faster, ridges slowly start to take shape as his cock fills out. wanting to bask in the uncomplicated attention just a few seconds longer, keith keeps his hand partly covering the problem appendage. ]
You're breathtaking. You literally took it just now..
[ punctuating the banter with with a playful squeeze of shiro's bicep, keith releases after a beat. ]
It's nice... being able to tell you that.
[ more than nice, but keith isn't consciously downplaying. in fact, it's more that he's tongue tied and has a stomach full of butterflies. so before he jams his foot in his mouth again, keith clambers up onto the bed as instructed and positions himself on his side, face partly smooshed into the pillow as he rolls to face shiro. there, he delicately traces a line down his boyfriend's back, dragging fingertip over whole and scarred skin alike. ]
Sp you'll make me even more comfortable if you take everything off before getting in bed with me, Shiro.
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but then keith is on the bed and shiro gets a very generous view of keith’s voluptuous backside as he crawls and clambers across the bedding. below those asscheeks and between those thighs, there’s the bob of keith’ cock, and for the briefest of moments, shiro catches an unintentional glimpse. it’s too quick and too partially hidden for him to truly understand it, but something inside him does. all at once, there’s a slight, burgeoning apprehension in the pit of his stomach.
but then keith is rolled over and shiro’s gaze is up where it should be, once again doing the courteous boyfriend thing of not staring at the anatomy that has keith particularly nervous. he understands; afterall, this will be the first time he'll be seeing keith hard. feeling and glimpsing it through his pants isn’t quite the same, so this is a monumental moment and one that shiro is intent on respecting. ]
Oh, will I? [ his grin is good-humored and crooked, flashed over his shoulder. ] I do want you comfortable, so… okay, if that’s what you want.
[ such a big ask, heh. reluctantly separating him from the exploration of keith’s fingertip, shiro stands. he’s already got his fly open by the time he turns around to face the bed. down go the pants and boxer-briefs in one go. if he truly were a patient man, he’d indulge keith in a slower, more deliberate strip. but unfortunately, shiro’s lacking the finesse as he tears his feet free from each pant leg, socks following shortly thereafter. with that, he’s on the bed and crawling, situating himself in close. ]
I’d ask you if you like what you see, but I think it’s pretty obvious…
[ has he been good long enough? patient long enough? can he look now? he touches his hand to keith’s hip and gives an experimental nudge, finding no resistance. encouraged, he leads keith through a roll onto his back. and then he drags his gaze down; down from keith’s face, over his sternum, through the contours of his abdominals and there, to the jut of his pelvis where his cock is…
not normal. familiarly abnormal. ] Oh, fuck. [ it slips out of him on the exhale that seemingly punches out of him. he’d made the comparisons in his head, all the while assuring himself it was nothing more than his desire for keith hijacking the situation and giving too much life to his fantasies. as much as he’d wanted keith, he hadn’t wanted him like that. not actually. but… he did? he has? because there’s too many similarities in his head now: the voice, the shape of his body, the birthmark, the timing of an identical transformation. now he has a dick with multiple ridges that he is silently counting in his head. same number, similar if not the same length, thickness, color…
oh fuck is right. keith frequents gloryholes? ]
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if his lizard brain weren't so fucking immensely preoccupied, perhaps keith would have had greater presence of mind to wonder about the vague familiarity -- but then again, just how much variation can there really be to big dicks anyway? but more damningly, when shiro rolls him onto his back, keith goes willingly and lets his hand fall to the side.
cock now thick and ridged, it bounces up to meet shiro's gaze. even so, keith is sincerely hopeful enough about shiro's willingness to accept him that he simply exhales and offers up a shy smile. one look at shiro's face and that smile wilts. panic overtakes keith as he hurriedly sits up and covers his crotch. ]
I- if you don't like it, you don't have to...
[ touch? put it in his mouth? interact? keith fumbles, eyes darting towards the pile of his clothes on the floor. he should've seen this coming. shiro had made his reluctance to engage with alien anatomy abundantly clear back when keith was more galra looking, but how was keith supposed to mitigate this?
well. the answers are clearer in retrospect. he could have gently guided shiro's hand down to his cock while there were still clothes in the picture and invited the guy to explore with his hand, but it's far too late for that now. mortified and kicking himself, keith lets out a heavy sigh, shoulders slumping with his disappointment. ]
I should go.
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he’s two stages behind but keith is accelerating toward his own goal of averting disaster. whereas shiro is slogging through the gridlock of his brain to come to terms with the fact that he’s sexed up his best friend long before he had any allowance to, keith’s solution is to simply leave. he hasn’t moved to do as much, but shiro knows him; before he’s even said anything, his body speaks for him. it’s in the droop of his shoulders and the way he seemingly deflates, beaten up and broken down with disappointment.
shit.
get there faster, he tells himself. stop hinging on the fact that keith is so clearly outside the realm of what is deemed normal and vanilla. so what if keith likes to hide his identity and fuck? shiro does, too. they are the same. perhaps their reasons are even similar. the problem here though, is that shiro knows his own limitations. he fucked around with anonymity, yes, but only with one person in some watered down version of a relationship. has keith frequented other locations? other partners? how into this kink is keith, really?
i should go.
there it is. shiro isn’t there yet. he still somewhere between horror and reconciliation, but he panics in the moment, immediately exclaiming: ]
No! [ before he knows it, his own hand is on keith’s shoulder, not quite pushing him down, but firm enough to prevent him from shifting anywhere. swallowing in the following beat, shiro composes himself for a less rushed: ] No, you should stay.
[ gaze on keith’s face now, shiro tries to bolster his expression into something more encouraging. ]
I’m sorry. I just wasn’t expecting… [ you to be into being fucked through a door…? he grimaces, gaze dropping for a beat, before he remembers himself to force it back to keith’s face. ] There’s nothing wrong with it. I was surprised, but I’m fine, uhm… now.
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how can it?
this isn't the first time that he's shown his dick to others, but it is by far the worst reaction it's received. not even lance of all people had reacted this strongly, though perhaps in part because keith had given him advance warning. ... and quite possibly the guy wanted to fuck a mermaid so it's not like abnormal genitals were ever a serious turn off.
heat continues to burn keith's cheeks and ears, despite the reassurance. of course there's nothing wrong with his cock, it's just .... keith hangs his head. ]
Listen. If this is a dealbreaker like how women are for you, you don't have to try to like me. I know you're not ..... you know. Into aliens like that.
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that begs the question though: how clear does shiro want to be in explaining what the issue is?
he swallows, thinking of what coming clean would be like. it had taken him weeks, months to fully accept that he craved those hookups with anonymous. what if keith thinks of him differently as a result? what if he becomes the one freaking out? ]
It’s not a dealbreaker.
[ biding his time, he takes the cowardly option of weaving around the actual issue, hoping that he can set things right without dragging keith into this with him. he just needs time. time to come to terms with it himself. then he’ll break it to keith… when he himself knows how to process it. so he repeats: ]
I was surprised and I didn’t handle it well. [ understatement, if keith is currently putting himself in the same category as women in terms of shiro's level of disinterest. sighing, he turns more toward keith, touching his free hand to one of keith’s forearms. ] But I still want this and I still want you… unless I’ve turned you off so badly that you don’t want me…?
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he keeps his eyes on shiro's hand for a long beat before finally looking up at his boyfriend, expression a blend of sheepish, shy and hopeful. ]
I always want you.
[ it's a complicated kind of want, and not one that keith is always sure he wants to examie. porn prison fuckery has somehow brought the two of them together, despite the breaks in space-time or by plucking them from alternate realities. whatever the case, there's a shiro back home with white hair and a missing arm who's more than millions of light-years away. even when they're together, it's like they don't know how to talk to each other anymore.
clones, death and being replaced have a way of doing that, keith supposes.
this shiro may not be his shiro - or maybe he is? either way, when keith looks at him, he feels less adrift, less alone in the world. like maybe their bond can survive the war in some way, despite the hurt and confusion rhwy're all enduring..
keith blinks, then clears his throat. thinking about all this is the last thing he ought to be doing when it only opens up chasms in his chest, huh? he looks away briefly to gather himself then offers up a shy smile as he leans in close, shifting the hand on his crotch away to instead perch on shiro's hip. ]
Guess I should have warned you. I just... don't know how to talk about it.. In a way that doesn't sound super weird and unsexy.
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keith does deserve to know, he supposes. when neither of them knew – no, he didn’t need to know. but now that shiro has stumbled into this knowledge, the imbalance is too great to ignore. it’s wrong otherwise, for shiro to proceed by pleasing this boy while keith thinks this is the very first time. if keith is going to be with him, he has to make that decision with the full picture.
… god, shiro hopes he still wants to be with him after this. just – he broke a door. and he’s pretty sure he took his virginity, only to throw a fit about it later. and he left him that one time to go give “other” him a thirty minute orgasm. oh, fuck, he also ghosted him.
his head is beginning to hurt. he’s grimacing, eyes shuttering as every moment together pieces together, overlapping the two separate lives. as disruptive as this known identity is, it also explains a lot of things. like keith walking with a slight limp after a fuck with anonymous. like keith’s voice being hoarse after anonymous mouth spent a good portion of their hook up deepthroating. like how – okay no, he’s getting sidetracked.
keith leans in and shiro instantly forces what he hopes is a convincing smile when keith offers a shy one his way. he’s not covering his crotch anymore; that’s a good sign. what isn’t is that keith has completely lost all those lovely ridges, his arousal completely drained out of him. shiro swallows back the urge to sigh miserably, the facade of that smile cracking a little more. ]
You can talk to me about anything. [ at least that’s genuine in pitch and meaning. he leans in further to peck keith’s forehead, though it’s mostly just hair he gets and then he leans back to look at him again. ] Just like I can talk to you about anything.
[ it’s difficult at times but shiro has gotten better about that. he’s talked of his time as a prisoner, his fears, his insecurities… and he supposes he’s about to talk about kinks. there’s an obvious beat of hesitation as he wrestles his cooperativeness into actually making his mouth form words. ]
In fact, I think there’s something I need to talk to you about right now.
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Oh.
[ the quiet syllable escapes before keith can think better of it. likewise, hhis eyes go a little wide and startled before keith is able to properly button down the trepidation. judging from shiro's tone and serious expression, whatever he has to say can't be any god, which begs the question of what exactly needs to be disclosed specifically before sex.
for better or for worse, one possible answer comes relatively quickly. if they need to talk about something serious prior to sex, then it's likely an std, right? again before keith can think better of it, his gaze shifts down to shiro's cock before blinking back up at his boyfriend's face.
what good exactly does staring at dick do when dealing with possible alien stds that may not manifest externally? flustering keith stammers: ]
Um, yeah. Okay. Is uh... is everything okay?
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Yeah. Everything is fine.
[ everything is not fine. he’s freaking out. there’s a clatter in his chest and a sweatiness to his nape. he’s far too warm in the face, too, which is only aiding in that overheated, panicky feeling zipping through him. he draws a breath, trying to steady his composure. ]
It’s just… okay.
[ it’s so easy. one sentence, two sentences max and he could clear this up: i’m the anonymous penpal you used to meet up with at the house up by the pool, i’m sorry i just figured it out myself, hence the reaction to your dick, which is lovely by the way. instead, he mucks it up by trying to gently lay the groundwork of the revelation. ]
I’ve wanted you for a long time. I fought it for just as long because I’m a bit of a fool. But even then, I used to fantasize about you when I was with someone else. When we were together, I’d like to pretend that he was you. But it turns out I didn’t need to pretend.
[ he gives his hands twin squeezes, not at all comprehending that he isn’t making any sort of sense. ]
He was you.
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so maybe it's not an std, but clearly it's something embarrassing if the way shiro's gone red-faced has anything to say about it. keith is out of guesses though, and soon finds himself pulled down an equally bizarre rabbit hole wherein shiro is seemingly confessing to thinking about him while banging other men -- toji and whoever else, and keith is once again unable to keep his degree of perplexion off his face. it hits in waves, really. shiro never talks about the other guys he's with, never mind the sorts of fantasies he has. keith's barely shifted through the ugly jealous possessiveness that flares to life when the last bombshell drops. ]
What?
[ blurted out and thoroughly ill-advised, keith pulls back somewhat to get a better look at shiro's face. there's enough bullshit that goes on in porn prison that the meaning doesn't even register immediately. ]
How was Toji me, exactly?
[ the question is entirely nonsensical, but keith doesn't know how else to parse this conundrum. ]
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… What?
[ so a bit of echoing going on here. he doesn’t want to give into the exasperation just begging to take over and he tries, really tries not to become frustrated with having that blasted name thrown in his face, again, especially when shiro is trying to explain something of importance here. blame the fact that he’s already agitated and nervous for the way he lets go of keith’s hands, sighing at keith’s ability to not only misunderstand, but to jump to a completely unrelated topic. ]
How did you get Toji from that?
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keith blurts, clearly chagrined and a pinch defensive. ]
How am I not supposed to get Toji from that?! You said you were fantasizing about me while you were with some other guy and that it tirmed out to be me, but we've -- you and I, we never --
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putting aside that labelling that as "being together" in the first place is suspect, that can't possibly be what shiro's referencing here, right? so what does that leave? unconsciously being with shiro? there are certainly enough drugs going around prison that this could easily be facilitated with a fucked up concoction of hypnotic and anesthetic, but if shiro knew about that then this wouldn't be the time to bring that up, right?
hell. to think less than a minute ago, keith was here braced for some reveal about space stds. is this better or worse? still getting an eyeful of judgment, keith looks away -- rethinking this whole thing.
there aren't too many guys he's been with. in fact, it's down to just lance and anon. shiro is obviously not lance which leaves ... the absurd implication that anon is shiro. it's so ridiculous, in fact, that keith winds up looking at shiro again, brow wrinkled up with confusion and judgment.
this is shiro. his best friend. his best friend who can't possibly be into choking guys with his dick at the library or fucking them through holes in doors and especially isn't into sleeping with aliens. okay, admittedly keith has little to no insight into shiro's private sex life, but still. the guy that had wanted to take things slowly to make sure things felt right between them can't possibly be so impatient and horny that he'll literally bang a door off its hinges to sink a dick in an extra half inch, right?
rimming. metal arm. large cock. pale skin. strong physique. that time he thought he might've heard his name, but was way too out of it to be sure.
the counter evidence lines up shot after shot, as keith's staring takes a distinct dive south to take a hard look at shiro's cock. identifying anyone by their dick seems like some fucked up porny scooby doo bullshit, but that doesn't stop keith from squinting at the head and girth like he's doing some rudimentary volumetric analysis of how it might fit in his mouth.
he looks up again, and this time his face isn't flushed with embarrassment. rather, his voice has gotten thick with incredulity. ]
... Are you saying what I think you're saying?
[ is this entrapment? is he being pranked? ]
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turns out, it isn’t much longer after that.
keith looks up, locks eyes and… – god, it was a mistake to let go of his hands, because now shiro’s are empty. meaning, he doesn’t know what to do with them as his own apprehension spikes. fiddling his thumb and fingers together in each hand, his pinches and rolls the pads together, soon shifting to hooking his thumbnails on that of his middle fingers to make this soft, repetitive clicking sounds.
this is it. this is his last opening to laugh, smile, and say something half-convincing to divert them from the truth of their history. he’s surprisingly cowardly when it comes to keith, at least in terms of maintaining the strength of their bond, so he almost takes it. he almost takes the out.
but he presses his lips together on a grimace and composes himself after a glance down at the sheets. the fiddling with his nails has stopped and once again at a loss of what to occupy his hands with, he ends up self-soothing with a palm to his nape, rubbing back and forth as he looks to keith once more. slowly, he nods. just once. and then: ]
I'm anonymous. [ a beat. ] You know, with the smileys.
[ does that need a distinction? ]
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confirmation of what keith suspects doesn't take much longer to manifest. the nod somehow has all the gravitas of receiving a death sentence and keith flails all the way back until his head hits the headboard. the sound of skull bumping hard against wood isn't a pleasant sound, but keith doesn't even seem to notice. ]
It was you?!
[ processing that in any meaningful way is impossible. thoughts crumble and morph like he's being spun thorugh a kaleidoscope and nothing he says follows any coherence either chronologically or by actual significance. arguably the only good to come of this is the fact that he misses the implication of shiro's emphasis on qualifying who anonymous even is ]
You snuck out of the cube to hook up with me? You're the one who was jerking off in the library?? [ his voice pitches ever higher as his incredulity grows to a fever pitch. ] You - you're the one who ghosted me? And put on a chainsmoker voice??
[ breathe, breathe, breathe. keith stares mouth agape, still clearly waiting for a punchline. ]
I thought you were gonna tell me you caught space crabs or something, Shiro.
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he means to defend himself. really, he does. but he’s being, of all things, polite. sympathetic, too. he doesn’t cut keith off, because frankly, he’s part convinced that keith will explode if he doesn’t get the words out, what with the way his voice is pitching higher than he’s ever heard it before. so he keeps to patience and self-soothes his own skyrocketing anxiety by ticking off the answers in his head.
yes, he snuck out because he was incredibly horny for keith but didn’t think he could have keith yet.
yes, he jerked off in the library but only due to that damn librarian spraying him with aphro.
yes, he ghosted him… to be faithful to him.
yes, he used a – wait, chainsmoker voice?
it derails him for a moment and it’s why he doesn’t take the opening as keith stares agape. regret kicks in instantly. ]
Space crabs – no! [ him? infected? what kind of sex life does keith think he leads!? nevermid that, even. what kind of person does he think he is? ] I wouldn’t… – if I had something, which I don’t, I wouldn’t wait until we’re in bed naked to tell you.
[ talk about an instant mood killer – and a bit of a dick move to drop that bombshell right into his unclothed lap.
… though. is the end result much different from where they are now? hands both empty again, he gestures nonsensically with them, mostly to keep himself from reaching for keith. ]
I didn’t know you were anonymous. Not until… [ don’t look. don’t look. don’t – okay, he looked, brows raising. not that it’s, you know, it’s very unique and identifying shape right now. ]
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of course he's not going to contest anything about space crabs. in fact, with the incredulity starting to drain out of his soul, keith simply follows shiro's gaze down to .... ah yes, his flaccid dick. keith groans, knees coming up in some attempt to shield that from view while he buries his face in his hands.
this whole time. this whole fuckng time, the mystery person with the incredible dick on the other side had been shiro. it doesn't matter that there's corroborating evidence to make that fact irrefutable, keith's entire being refuses to accept it. instead, little flashes of their encounters play in his mind, every wet noise he'd made, every time he lapped and sucked at that dick like it was spilling ambrosia into his mouth, the way he clung to the chair while anon fucked orgasms out of his ass and -- ]
Mmmrgh....
[ the nooise is distilled mortification. keith had never wanted shiro to see him that way. naked, shy and trying things together was never meant to ruined by the mutual knowledge of being bent over, hole presented through punched out doors. or tainted with images of slick pouring from his ass or him blabbering stupidly during an endless orgasm.
nobody was supposed to see any of these facets of things keith has only started to accept about himself. he sags low against the headboard, shoulders rounding until he's almost in the fetal position. ]
... I think I need a weblum to come swallow me whole right about now.
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he’s embarrassed. it’s an obvious thought, one that doesn’t need specific recognition, but shiro finds himself pausing on it, watching, vaguely fascinated, as keith hides in his hands. he begins to sink and sink against the headboard and it’s – huh, not funny, but considering shiro was bracing for more accusations and even keith storming out of here, the relief he feels is easily mistaken as something far lighter. thankfully, it isn’t so potent that he makes the mistake of settling into his relief with a bit of laughter. his voice does, however, take on a softer tone, alit with burgeoning confidence. ]
Hey… none of that. This isn’t the end of the world.
[ the mattress dips as shiro rearranges himself on it, putting himself against the headboard. he gathers keith and manually moves him himself to get him sitting up, where shiro is quick to loop his arm around him to hug him into his side. ]
This could even be a… uh, good thing…? [ that sure is convincing, isn’t it? he puffs out a breath, still not quite laughing, and presses a kiss to keith’s head to make up for it. ] We found our way to each other and not just that, we were good together. [ remember that talk about their insane chemistry? remember how not too long ago they’d both been nervous despite all the reassurances that they’d be compatible? he smiles, forcing a little more in hopes of coaxing keith into abandoning his hiding. ] So good. Best sex I’ve ever had.
[ … okay, maybe that’s being a touch too truthful. don’t judge him for it. ]
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there's an arm around him then, followed by a kiss pressed to his head. it's ... fuck. levity ahas returned to shiro's voice and for a moment, keith is thrown. he peeks above his fingertips, what's still visible of his forehead still a fierce cherry red. ]
You think so...?
[ it's not the angle that keith had been approaching this from at all. anon had obviously accepted him -- tacitly sure, until anon disappeared because well.. shiro pulled that stunt. in retrospect, that whole incident had been... kinda ridiculous, huh? two guys scrambling to end a pseudo relationship because of each other. keith groans, butting the side of his head against shiro's chest. ]
Was it really the best?
[ all things considered, perhaps not what keith ought to be focusing on, but somehow reframing this whole thing from shiro's perspective is easier than looking at it from his own. ]
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heh, to think he’s gone a month without that now.
it’s no grand feat, really, because he has something else to fill the gap. he has a very cute, sometimes surprisingly shy boy, who curls up with him at night and offers him kisses when shiro is particularly sweet. it’s the polar opposite of the animalistic brutality of broken doors and roughly handled bodies, but somehow, it’s just as satisfying to keep him grounded and focused, not even a hint of regret making its way into his brain. ]
Yeah. [ he noses, briefly, at keith’s hair. ] It won’t be after tonight… or, I mean, whenever we…
[ they are very much naked in this very large bed of theirs, but even so, it suddenly feels presumptuous to assume that the evening is going to pan out the way they’d originally thought it would. truthfully? there’s disappointment to be found in the notion that they may delay another day, but overall, shiro isn’t too bothered by it. so the smile doesn’t flee and his good mood doesn’t dessert him; he clings tight to both, arm looping closer to encourage keith’s lean.
he lifts his head, only because the angle is deep enough that his neck protests. knocking it gently back to the headboard, shiro stares across the room, again stripping away layers to try for more honesty. ]
I enjoyed it. The freedom of not being seen. [ he’ll wager that much was the same for keith. so maybe he’s preaching to the choir here. nonetheless – ] I didn’t have to be me. I didn’t have to think like me, didn’t have to act like me, didn’t have to be what anyone expected me to be… I could block out everything and just… [ a breath. ] – feel good in the moment.
[ his fingers curl at keith’s hip, tracing abstract shapes into his skin. ]
… But now I wanna feel good with you. [ and considering keith’s been in his head for months now, superimposed onto someone who wasn’t supposed to be him, shiro can only assume being with the real keith is going to be so, so much better. ]
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they've been best friends for years, and for all their similarities and shared interests... it's still kind of fascinating to think maybe they do feel similarly about sex. of course, that isn't something keith anticipated. after all, shiro's had other partners and a sex life that predated the one imposed on them by the warden.
sex isn't inherently unnatural or some grotesque scrambling of his autonomy. of course keith knows that, but in practice it's been harder to come to terms with actually being okay with wanting it for himself because experience hasn't always been equated with choice. there's a word for that -- trauma, perhaps, but a rough life has made it difficult to even unpack that for what it is. after all, he's been in more battles than he cares to count, and seen more people die than he wants to remember. this is nothing in comparison, right?
or so he thought. in the end, it's exactly as shiro said. it had been freeing to be someone other than himself while allowing anon to explore his body. it had been more enjoyable precisely because keith didn't have to think or feel anything than what he was made to feel by anon's fingers and tongue and cock.
shiro's.
keith tries out the correction, eyes still on his boyfriend's face, then has to look away when the flutter in his chest refuses to subside. he hiccups a tiny laugh, twisting enough to bump his cheek to shiro's chest. and then... what that isn't close enough? keith frees himself from shiro's arm to carefully straddle his thighs. ]
It could still be tonight. If you want. [ if you want. keith shakes his head, unsatisfied. ] Because that's what I want.
[ still smiling, keith traces a long line from collarbone down to shiro's flesh hand, taking it and intertwining their fingers. ]
Sounds stupid but... I really didn't want to want., I guess. [ he huffs, expression turning slightly self deprecating. ] Heh. You know. If you hadn't ghosted me, I was planning on saying thank you. For helping me figure things out ... and for showing me it was gonna be okay. ....Aaand then I was going to break it off with you because I realized that even though things were okay, I didn't want to be just okay. I wanted you. [ a beat. ] No, I want you. I want to kiss you. I wanna be able to say your name while we touch.
[ pause. is that too subtle? ]
I want to look at you and hold you while you fuck me.
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he can’t say he’s surprised by the revelation. he harbors favoritism for keith; he has for a long time, even when he was vehement of his denial for it.
throughout keith’s talking, shiro keeps his smile, watching patiently and fondly, as keith works through his own wants. he squeezes encouragingly at his hand, his free one rubbing at keith’s thigh. it travels up in the pause, thumb tracing along the angle of keith’s pelvic bone as his fingers curl around and his palm flattens to his hip. while you fuck me. his gaze is steady, but growing heavier, because while he doesn’t make any obvious outward reaction to it, his abdomen tightens on a flutter and a shiver runs down his spine, accumulating and spreading through his lower body to make him twitch. ]
I want that, too.
[ he breathes out the words, voice already weighty with renewed desire. leaning in, he tips the angle to press a kiss to keith’s jaw, nosing further along the hard line of it. fuck, being able to see keith’s face when they’re connected… – he wanted that before. he tried to create a poor man’s mimic of such intimacy by riding anonymous and himself of the door. it simply wasn’t enough. the eyes, the mouth, the sweaty tangles of hair – the best parts were covered up. so that’s all it takes, one little mention, and shiro is quickly losing his patience and composure. he’s thinking of keith arching off the sheets, hair haloed around him as he tries to focus his eyes. fuck. or keith riding him just like this, with his head tipped back and neck arched. shiro would have to take a fistful of his hair and yank him down, huh? he’d have to keep those eyes on him, to never waver throughout every drop down of keith’s body.
he groans, metal fingers tightening at his hip. ] Bet you’re a sight when you’re full of me. [ his body has certainly been greedy for his cock; does that insatiable desire make its way to keith’s face? does he go all dark eyed and flushed, soft, full lips finally able to to part around noises that won’t be muffled? ] Can’t believe I’ve had you all those times and I never got to see, got to hear…
[ he huffs a breath just barely resembling a laugh and then explores his galra hand up keith’s torso, sliding in to skim his fingertips along the shape of his pec and over his nipple. ]
I said your name once. [ cooed. casual. ] Do you remember? [ he pulls back to get a full look at keith, grinning. ] You felt so good around me that I lost my mind. [ a beat, fingers giving a playful pinch at his nip. ] Think you can do it again? Maybe make me yell it this time… not in that chainsmoker voice you love so much?
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barely a minute in, and everything is different. constraints enforced by glory holes and anonymity had eliminated most avenues of foreplay. even towards the end of those hook ups, there'd still been a sheet to keep most of him covered, and touch had almost always been more more direct right from the get go. hands on his cock, fingers scissoring his rim, a tongue pushed inside his hole -- all with the assumption of enforced silence.
shiro's voice in this context is damn near intoxicating. kisses, butterfly touches and pinches. keith moans as fingers squeeze a half dime pert, cock filling out again fast with a twitch. fuck -- those stupid mandatory "good mate" classes have more or less drilled into his head what's considered an erogenous zone, but knowing the nipple is one of those things is still not wholly the same as discovering in real time that he's sensitive here too. he flushes, slowly lettin expelling a long puff of breath as he gathers his wits. ]
I remember.... [ voice breathy, keith drags his hnads up shiro's arms, feeling the strength in his boyfriend's biceps and shoulders with appreciative squeezes. he shivers, before scooting a little closer hips just shy of being flush to shiro's but close enough that the tip of his cock brushess just beneath shiro's cockhead. ] Kind of.. I wasn't really really thinking straight at all.
[ he laughs, looking sheepish for a moment. ]
Being full of you kinda has that effect.
[ of course, being in the throes of a frighteningly long orgasm hadn't exactly helped his coherence either. keith glances down at their almost touching cocks, then looks back up at shiro to steal an open mouthed kiss and pulls away with a gentle bite at his lower lip. that bit of cheek is all the warning shiro gets before keith reaches down to grab him by the balls. ]
You'd yell if I squeezed now, yeah?
[ he wouldn't, of course. a point made self evident a half beat later when he lets go in favor of indulgently tracing a thick vein up to the frenulum simply because he can.. being the one covered up has kept keith strictly on the receiving end of anon's whims, and it's exhilarating to look and see how shiro reacts to him for a change. ]
Heh. it's our first real time together and you're already turning it into a challenge. Unbelievable.
[ except it's not. it's so ridiculous shiro that even though keith is teasing, his heart is overstuffed with fondness. ]
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Fitting, that I end with the morning porn.
i feel contractually obligated to tag this so you have more morning porn
i am mid-morning porning. i am losing my edge.
it is still morning porn, it counts??
Coffee, actual food breakfast and porn; you're set up for a wonderful day
it's true, my day was stacked
and here we go again with an attack of tags
and now it is my turn to morning porn....
and so it continues
shl it really does because here i am... in the morning. writing filth
two morning porns in one day, what is happening
THREE.
This isn't morning porn but... Does it still count.
i say yes in spirit.
here i am to sin
or bless jizzus's birthday...??
How can one comment box hold so much curse
it is a mystery
p sure the answer to the mystery is you
but i am such a good bean....
you are, you are, i appreciate you at 7:30 AM. i've doomed us all.
ah. so i should expect another blizzard then.
YOU BETTER NOT GET ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE. DON'T EVEN JINX IT
sfhjkls ok
i am leaving you on read here bc you left me on read elsewhere
BY ACCIDENT!! also happy first tag of 2023
my first tag was wholesome and yours was filth, ic how this year is going to pan out
YOU TOLD ME TO???
i am being slandered per usual
I SAID SO MANY NICE THINGS ON THAT LOVE MEE.
OKAY TRUE and it touched my lil heart ; ~ ; ty for being so kind
/wears my good bean badge
this once, you deserve it
I ALWAYS deserve this badge
what about when you're talking about people being trampled at walmart
LISTEN i take no joy in that??? i was merely making cultural observations.
UH HUH. walmart is our place of worship apparently
LISTEN. I AM ONLY POINTING OUT POINTS ONF DIFFERENCE.
i want you to know, that every time i go to walmart now, i think of this "cultural difference"
sfdhjskl does that count as enhancement...
... i suppose i must now add walmart to the list
lol the list of enhanced words is incredible
just everything about the main list is perfection
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i said AM porn, so here it is: AM porn
i can't believe you are now back in AM porn land
i hate this tag, i want you to know
i cringed the whole time typing a response
i just... will keith ever find out that he has a beet booty
shiro could tell him!!! or i guess make out with him immediately after...
perhaps shiro should take a picture of his booty hole and simply show him
gosh he could LOL
perhaps he can print it out and take it w him to canada
i can't believe this is their future. looking at filthy pictures and talking about the good old days
fjkghgw it'll keep them warm???
but my tundra research says otherwise??
fjkjhg ah yes. your pokemoning in the low 30s weather. i wonder if s + k can pokemon in the tundra
Important. Research.!!!!
IT REALLY IS. i value your commitment to the research of our many sheith verses
yes, i deserve to be appreciated
so modest
shhh you, too, are deserving of appreciation.
/insert cat hugging gif
BEAVER DAM IM YELLING
Keith has been Henry'd
....i will never look at that name the same way thanks
henry doesn't deserve this. he is such an innocent, fussy bean.
YOU DID THIS
ive been yelling at a constant pitch for 8 hrs. i cannot believe you brought approval kink into this
KEITH BROUGHT IT IN !! I AM ALSO YELLING.
i'll just be over here closing my eyes for eternity
can i join you?
... no. you're the one causing this eternity eye closing
YOU brought up the terminology!!
i continue to feel judged for providing such wonderful tags
we both know this judgment is highly warranted???
i admit to nothing
://///
c:
i am not fooled by this smile
:c
.... /pokes ur sad cheeks
... i hate that this tactic works in making the sad face less sad
dont be tsun
i do what i want!
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i'm kind of upset that i didn't get this up on easter because... well. y'know.
LOL i suppose you were merciful to zombie jesus
couldn't sin too much
uh huh uh huh
at this rate, we'll be doing this thread longer than titanic
ok that would make me laugh
we're already more than halfway there!
listen maybe tey'll go to bed now??
i think they will. shiro needs to recharge his prince
yes plug that prince in for recharging
the bunny 1 is in the way tho :c
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