[ … ah, shit. it’s odd to find himself feeling guilty all of a sudden, but having keith look at him like that, all the while saying he always wants him is… humbling. devastating. he’s such a sweetheart, with the kind of steadfast affection that, sometimes, leaves shiro feeling winded. right now is one of those moments. his lungs quiver and his breath hitches, his own expression going sweet and besotted, so thoroughly seduced by something that shouldn’t read wholesome as they both sit here ass naked. but that’s what shiro is: seduced. not just in body but in heart and mind, as well. it has him bending under the weight of guilt and truth, all prior certainty that he’d carry the knowledge of anonymous’ identity to another time, perhaps even to his grave, dispersing and once again leaving him at the beginning, to wonder if he should come clean now.
keith does deserve to know, he supposes. when neither of them knew – no, he didn’t need to know. but now that shiro has stumbled into this knowledge, the imbalance is too great to ignore. it’s wrong otherwise, for shiro to proceed by pleasing this boy while keith thinks this is the very first time. if keith is going to be with him, he has to make that decision with the full picture.
… god, shiro hopes he still wants to be with him after this. just – he broke a door. and he’s pretty sure he took his virginity, only to throw a fit about it later. and he left him that one time to go give “other” him a thirty minute orgasm. oh, fuck, he also ghosted him.
his head is beginning to hurt. he’s grimacing, eyes shuttering as every moment together pieces together, overlapping the two separate lives. as disruptive as this known identity is, it also explains a lot of things. like keith walking with a slight limp after a fuck with anonymous. like keith’s voice being hoarse after anonymous mouth spent a good portion of their hook up deepthroating. like how – okay no, he’s getting sidetracked.
keith leans in and shiro instantly forces what he hopes is a convincing smile when keith offers a shy one his way. he’s not covering his crotch anymore; that’s a good sign. what isn’t is that keith has completely lost all those lovely ridges, his arousal completely drained out of him. shiro swallows back the urge to sigh miserably, the facade of that smile cracking a little more. ]
You can talk to me about anything. [ at least that’s genuine in pitch and meaning. he leans in further to peck keith’s forehead, though it’s mostly just hair he gets and then he leans back to look at him again. ] Just like I can talk to you about anything.
[ it’s difficult at times but shiro has gotten better about that. he’s talked of his time as a prisoner, his fears, his insecurities… and he supposes he’s about to talk about kinks. there’s an obvious beat of hesitation as he wrestles his cooperativeness into actually making his mouth form words. ]
In fact, I think there’s something I need to talk to you about right now.
no subject
keith does deserve to know, he supposes. when neither of them knew – no, he didn’t need to know. but now that shiro has stumbled into this knowledge, the imbalance is too great to ignore. it’s wrong otherwise, for shiro to proceed by pleasing this boy while keith thinks this is the very first time. if keith is going to be with him, he has to make that decision with the full picture.
… god, shiro hopes he still wants to be with him after this. just – he broke a door. and he’s pretty sure he took his virginity, only to throw a fit about it later. and he left him that one time to go give “other” him a thirty minute orgasm. oh, fuck, he also ghosted him.
his head is beginning to hurt. he’s grimacing, eyes shuttering as every moment together pieces together, overlapping the two separate lives. as disruptive as this known identity is, it also explains a lot of things. like keith walking with a slight limp after a fuck with anonymous. like keith’s voice being hoarse after anonymous mouth spent a good portion of their hook up deepthroating. like how – okay no, he’s getting sidetracked.
keith leans in and shiro instantly forces what he hopes is a convincing smile when keith offers a shy one his way. he’s not covering his crotch anymore; that’s a good sign. what isn’t is that keith has completely lost all those lovely ridges, his arousal completely drained out of him. shiro swallows back the urge to sigh miserably, the facade of that smile cracking a little more. ]
You can talk to me about anything. [ at least that’s genuine in pitch and meaning. he leans in further to peck keith’s forehead, though it’s mostly just hair he gets and then he leans back to look at him again. ] Just like I can talk to you about anything.
[ it’s difficult at times but shiro has gotten better about that. he’s talked of his time as a prisoner, his fears, his insecurities… and he supposes he’s about to talk about kinks. there’s an obvious beat of hesitation as he wrestles his cooperativeness into actually making his mouth form words. ]
In fact, I think there’s something I need to talk to you about right now.