– but not when he’s on this side of it. self-deprecation and self-sacrifice are habitual things shiro is, unfortunately, well-versed in. of course he realizes that every time he distances himself from keith for one reason or another, it’s frustrating to keith. painful, too, but he’s always thought it to be a pain born from being denied what he wants in the moment. it hurts for another reason, though, huh? it actually hurts to sit here and listen, watch, feel keith closing in on himself with bitter words.
shiro has many regrets, some too traumatic to even begin to put into words, this here, though? this he can verbalize: he’s the one who is not good to keith. keith deserves better than someone who can’t get his thoughts and emotions in check. someone who can be open and honest from the beginning. someone who isn’t perpetually torn between love and obligation. someone who –
fuck, he’s doing it again.
if i could, i’d keep you with me.
as self-serving as it feels, like he’s the one getting the better end of the bargain, shiro banishes the temptation to talk himself down into a black hole of loathing, instead putting all of his focus back where it belongs: on keith. his smile is bittersweet, his expression never progressing further than what can only be deemed apologetic. his touch continues to be steady and sweet however, thumb scooting across his cheek again. ]
We can’t stay here, sweetheart.
[ punishment looms. they may not be able to escape being discovered for their latest acts, but they can’t keep doing this. they can’t settle for compromised autonomy and a small, secluded world. shiro’s drive to explore and experience the unknown may have darkened somewhat from what it used to be, but keith… fuck, shiro can’t stomach the thought of someone as beautiful and vibrant as this boy being locked up forever. keith is meant to soar, not to have his wings clipped so readily.
taking a breath, shiro forces his voice lighter, hope and encouragement coloring his next words. ]
But that doesn’t mean you can’t keep me.
[ another caress of his thumb and then he bows a little closer, voice softening as though sharing a secret. ]
… You promised, remember? I’m counting on you to help me figure this out… because I need you just as much.
shhhh everything is fine. we get to have good food today
i’m not good to you.
– but not when he’s on this side of it. self-deprecation and self-sacrifice are habitual things shiro is, unfortunately, well-versed in. of course he realizes that every time he distances himself from keith for one reason or another, it’s frustrating to keith. painful, too, but he’s always thought it to be a pain born from being denied what he wants in the moment. it hurts for another reason, though, huh? it actually hurts to sit here and listen, watch, feel keith closing in on himself with bitter words.
shiro has many regrets, some too traumatic to even begin to put into words, this here, though? this he can verbalize: he’s the one who is not good to keith. keith deserves better than someone who can’t get his thoughts and emotions in check. someone who can be open and honest from the beginning. someone who isn’t perpetually torn between love and obligation. someone who –
fuck, he’s doing it again.
if i could, i’d keep you with me.
as self-serving as it feels, like he’s the one getting the better end of the bargain, shiro banishes the temptation to talk himself down into a black hole of loathing, instead putting all of his focus back where it belongs: on keith. his smile is bittersweet, his expression never progressing further than what can only be deemed apologetic. his touch continues to be steady and sweet however, thumb scooting across his cheek again. ]
We can’t stay here, sweetheart.
[ punishment looms. they may not be able to escape being discovered for their latest acts, but they can’t keep doing this. they can’t settle for compromised autonomy and a small, secluded world. shiro’s drive to explore and experience the unknown may have darkened somewhat from what it used to be, but keith… fuck, shiro can’t stomach the thought of someone as beautiful and vibrant as this boy being locked up forever. keith is meant to soar, not to have his wings clipped so readily.
taking a breath, shiro forces his voice lighter, hope and encouragement coloring his next words. ]
But that doesn’t mean you can’t keep me.
[ another caress of his thumb and then he bows a little closer, voice softening as though sharing a secret. ]
… You promised, remember? I’m counting on you to help me figure this out… because I need you just as much.