[ in less than a week, it seems as though every seam holding keith's world together is pulling apart. it all started with the confusion and heartache of dialed-back affection from shiro which has spiraled into something impossible to navigate and has bled out into the further destabilization of reparacija itself.
of course, the two events aren't causally related, but timed one after another, it's hard not to be constantly uneasy over the escalation of dreary uncertainty. they're supposed to be stronger together, weathering whatever storms come their way, but these days they sleep apart and keep conversation at such a superficial level that keith would almost prefer not talking at all.
but that isn't what keith actually wants. he wants to be with shiro, and have his boyfriend back, even though it's unbearably lonely to be in love. because yeah, sure, neither of them were in their right minds when i love you was freely traded back and forth, but keith can't pretend that it hasn't knocked something into alignment in his soul.
in some sick way, this sudden distance is familiar. keith had never been in love with the shiro from his reality, but their friendship hasn't been the same. here in prison, it feels a lot like watching history repeat itself, slow and cruel. keith hates it with ever atom in his body, but he doesn't know how to pretend or lie about his feelings the way shiro wants him to.
so maybe the newly established warden and his ominous threats are actually a blessing in disguise. surely this warrants discussion together? long after the space wolf's fallen asleep after listening to keith talk himself in mental circles, he finally gets up. armed with nothing but speculation however, keith decides he ought to go to shiro's cube with something more useful. scoping out the new construction site that's just been rushed to completion would at least be a starting point.
it's still early enough to avoid some repercussions for breaking curfew, but with limited time on his hands, keith hurriedly makes it toward the completed construction site to find a stage. having been in porn prison long enough, keith has no doubts as to why this stage was fucking built in the first place, but soon enough it's not the assortment of horrible bondage rigs that holds his attention. ]
...Shiro?
[ keith almost doesn't recognize him because this doesn't seem like something shiro would participate in. but even uncharacteristcally posed naked, bound and gagged with some stomach-churning funnel attachment, there's no mistaking that the man on stage is shiro.
heart pounding in his chest, keith forgets everything else, pushing past a crowd of ogling inmates to elbow and muscle his way onto the stage. one word -- one sign that shiro actually wants to be here, and keith swears that he'll back the fuck off and stop acting like he has any claim to shiro in anyway, but until then: ]
Shiro!
[ trying desperately not to look in the funnel to see if it's been used or not, keith instead kneels to the ground to hold his best friends' face. the eyes are all wrong. vacant, glassy, and staring -- keith finds himself unable to breathe, think or feel anything, all sensation shattered. ]
how dare
of course, the two events aren't causally related, but timed one after another, it's hard not to be constantly uneasy over the escalation of dreary uncertainty. they're supposed to be stronger together, weathering whatever storms come their way, but these days they sleep apart and keep conversation at such a superficial level that keith would almost prefer not talking at all.
but that isn't what keith actually wants. he wants to be with shiro, and have his boyfriend back, even though it's unbearably lonely to be in love. because yeah, sure, neither of them were in their right minds when i love you was freely traded back and forth, but keith can't pretend that it hasn't knocked something into alignment in his soul.
in some sick way, this sudden distance is familiar. keith had never been in love with the shiro from his reality, but their friendship hasn't been the same. here in prison, it feels a lot like watching history repeat itself, slow and cruel. keith hates it with ever atom in his body, but he doesn't know how to pretend or lie about his feelings the way shiro wants him to.
so maybe the newly established warden and his ominous threats are actually a blessing in disguise. surely this warrants discussion together? long after the space wolf's fallen asleep after listening to keith talk himself in mental circles, he finally gets up. armed with nothing but speculation however, keith decides he ought to go to shiro's cube with something more useful. scoping out the new construction site that's just been rushed to completion would at least be a starting point.
it's still early enough to avoid some repercussions for breaking curfew, but with limited time on his hands, keith hurriedly makes it toward the completed construction site to find a stage. having been in porn prison long enough, keith has no doubts as to why this stage was fucking built in the first place, but soon enough it's not the assortment of horrible bondage rigs that holds his attention. ]
...Shiro?
[ keith almost doesn't recognize him because this doesn't seem like something shiro would participate in. but even uncharacteristcally posed naked, bound and gagged with some stomach-churning funnel attachment, there's no mistaking that the man on stage is shiro.
heart pounding in his chest, keith forgets everything else, pushing past a crowd of ogling inmates to elbow and muscle his way onto the stage. one word -- one sign that shiro actually wants to be here, and keith swears that he'll back the fuck off and stop acting like he has any claim to shiro in anyway, but until then: ]
Shiro!
[ trying desperately not to look in the funnel to see if it's been used or not, keith instead kneels to the ground to hold his best friends' face. the eyes are all wrong. vacant, glassy, and staring -- keith finds himself unable to breathe, think or feel anything, all sensation shattered. ]
Shiro, who did this to you?