[ shiro tries not to overthink it. their situation is a clusterfuck on every level and if he allows himself to pick it apart, he’ll spiral. so he sets a goal and fixates on that. that’s how he survived captivity with the galra. the goal was as simple as it could be: survive. wallowing in the deaths of those at his hands wasn’t allowed, neither did he grant himself the luxury of buckling to the druids. all of that came after, when he was physically free of captivity; that’s when his mind revolted, wiping clean to tangle up in a turmoil that he felt but couldn’t fully understand. this second stint in alien prison was meant to be much the same. he came into this with the full intention of soliciting himself through every needed checkmark… but then he found pidge and lance and hunk… and keith. the goal changed from getting himself out as quickly as possible to sticking around until each paladin left before him.
and so, things have gotten complicated in these past months.
he’s entangled himself with his best friend, going so far as to become his boyfriend, whatever that means in a place like this. even then, he’s tried not to analyze that decision too deeply, because he knows the moment he does, he’ll find it increasingly difficult to justify what it is that they’re doing. there is no future here. even if they weren’t the paladins of voltron and held responsible for the safety of their universe, they can’t stay in a place that compromises their autonomy each and every day. this is a doomed relationship.
they’re merely… what? enjoying each other until they go home? it sounds bad when put like that, but it’s the truth nonetheless. again, the thought that they ought to be focusing on their sheets together threatens to settle firmly in his head and derail him in the moment, but just as before, he brushes it to the back of his mind. it’s going to be more difficult after this. the last month has been about growing together and ensuring that tonight would be beneficial, rather than detrimental to their relationship. now, they’re in the process of achieving that, so what next will shiro focus on? what’s the next goal? the original one of finishing the sheet quickly?
god, he wasn’t supposed to become attached like this. neither was keith. but now keith’s talking about not wanting to leave without him, that he wants to be with him always. and frankly? it makes shiro swell and warm, absolutely delighted by the confirmation of keith’s feelings… but then he does exactly what he tries not to do: he overthinks it. there’s no possible way in which that can work and if they start hoping for some way… if they get sidetracked trying to make a way…
he thinks of his keith in his own timeline. he’s different from this one. they aren’t the same in action, nor in feeling… but perhaps the potential for something is there. that’s the only comfort he can find in all of this, though even that feels shallow and oddly unwanted. is that how keith feels about the shiro in his timeline? ]
You will be. [ he smiles a weak, brittle thing, eyes not at all matching the curve as they take on an apologetic shine. ] You have your Shiro waiting for you.
no subject
and so, things have gotten complicated in these past months.
he’s entangled himself with his best friend, going so far as to become his boyfriend, whatever that means in a place like this. even then, he’s tried not to analyze that decision too deeply, because he knows the moment he does, he’ll find it increasingly difficult to justify what it is that they’re doing. there is no future here. even if they weren’t the paladins of voltron and held responsible for the safety of their universe, they can’t stay in a place that compromises their autonomy each and every day. this is a doomed relationship.
they’re merely… what? enjoying each other until they go home? it sounds bad when put like that, but it’s the truth nonetheless. again, the thought that they ought to be focusing on their sheets together threatens to settle firmly in his head and derail him in the moment, but just as before, he brushes it to the back of his mind. it’s going to be more difficult after this. the last month has been about growing together and ensuring that tonight would be beneficial, rather than detrimental to their relationship. now, they’re in the process of achieving that, so what next will shiro focus on? what’s the next goal? the original one of finishing the sheet quickly?
god, he wasn’t supposed to become attached like this. neither was keith. but now keith’s talking about not wanting to leave without him, that he wants to be with him always. and frankly? it makes shiro swell and warm, absolutely delighted by the confirmation of keith’s feelings… but then he does exactly what he tries not to do: he overthinks it. there’s no possible way in which that can work and if they start hoping for some way… if they get sidetracked trying to make a way…
he thinks of his keith in his own timeline. he’s different from this one. they aren’t the same in action, nor in feeling… but perhaps the potential for something is there. that’s the only comfort he can find in all of this, though even that feels shallow and oddly unwanted. is that how keith feels about the shiro in his timeline? ]
You will be. [ he smiles a weak, brittle thing, eyes not at all matching the curve as they take on an apologetic shine. ] You have your Shiro waiting for you.