[ see? this is what shiro wanted to avoid. pity party. shiro came here to comfort keith and what has he done? upset him first and then after narrowly patching that up, has somehow turned the tables to guilt keith into coddling him instead. some leader, huh? some best friend, huh? miserably, shiro closes his eyes, yet doesn’t interrupt. he listens and he stews, ignoring the heavy beat, beat of his heart resounding in his ears that’s still, mercilessly, not loud enough to drown out the sorrow in keith’s voice.
he hates this. he’s been telling himself from the beginning that this prison is easier. better. freewill is similarly stripped but there’s some leeway in their ability to live. the food is a wildcard and the occasional prison wide hijinx stirs the pot, but aside from that, they get to choose the who, the what, the where and the when in accordance to their community service. a few one night stands isn’t so bad, not when shiro’s lived through a sentence that’s involved murder and experimentation.
but it’s starting to wear on him, especially when he thinks too heavily about the team. he doesn’t want this for them. if he could, he’d take on their sheets and have them sent back to their own realities.
… at least, that’s what he tells himself.
he’s not supposed to be comforted by everything keith is saying. it’s not far off from shiro’s own pep-talks: we’re a team, we stick together, come to me if anyone or anything gives you trouble. he’s supposed to be stronger than needing to hear it directed at him. it touches deep though, every word’s weight is aided by the forehead against him and the arm around him. shiro feels – grounded. secure, almost, like it’d actually be okay to not be okay, because keith has him.
so would he actually take on keith’s sentence and have him sent away if given the chance? the answer isn’t as clear as it had been a month ago. all at once, the thought rips that feeling of stability out from under him and to compensate, he grabs with his left at keith’s hand. he squeezes it there at his belly, holding tighter, eyes still closed and teeth chewing at his bottom lip.
okay, is his line. that’s all he has to say and then maybe he can divert to a goodnight that’ll end any further discussion. but his voice whispers low: ]
Will you think less of me if I say I’m glad you’re here?
[ because shiro thinks less of himself. it feels selfish. feels gross. he hates that keith is here, being forced into vulnerable moments… but a part of shiro is grateful too. keith being here makes this place a little less terrible. ]
no subject
he hates this. he’s been telling himself from the beginning that this prison is easier. better. freewill is similarly stripped but there’s some leeway in their ability to live. the food is a wildcard and the occasional prison wide hijinx stirs the pot, but aside from that, they get to choose the who, the what, the where and the when in accordance to their community service. a few one night stands isn’t so bad, not when shiro’s lived through a sentence that’s involved murder and experimentation.
but it’s starting to wear on him, especially when he thinks too heavily about the team. he doesn’t want this for them. if he could, he’d take on their sheets and have them sent back to their own realities.
… at least, that’s what he tells himself.
he’s not supposed to be comforted by everything keith is saying. it’s not far off from shiro’s own pep-talks: we’re a team, we stick together, come to me if anyone or anything gives you trouble. he’s supposed to be stronger than needing to hear it directed at him. it touches deep though, every word’s weight is aided by the forehead against him and the arm around him. shiro feels – grounded. secure, almost, like it’d actually be okay to not be okay, because keith has him.
so would he actually take on keith’s sentence and have him sent away if given the chance? the answer isn’t as clear as it had been a month ago. all at once, the thought rips that feeling of stability out from under him and to compensate, he grabs with his left at keith’s hand. he squeezes it there at his belly, holding tighter, eyes still closed and teeth chewing at his bottom lip.
okay, is his line. that’s all he has to say and then maybe he can divert to a goodnight that’ll end any further discussion. but his voice whispers low: ]
Will you think less of me if I say I’m glad you’re here?
[ because shiro thinks less of himself. it feels selfish. feels gross. he hates that keith is here, being forced into vulnerable moments… but a part of shiro is grateful too. keith being here makes this place a little less terrible. ]